Time to start using this again...

I never thought I would use this blog again, but I decided I should start writing more while my life crumbles around me...

I don't even know where to begin, so I'm just going to type until I have nothing else to type and hope it all makes sense. I've come to the conclusion that I mentally can't handle relationships, specifically romantic ones (granted I can't handle general ones too much better). I'm too emotionally unstable. I don't like being around people, especially girls. I really want to have friends, a girlfriend, I want what all my "friends" have, but I simply can't. Every relationship I have ever had ended horribly. I always blamed the significant other in question for what happened, but after 4 horribly failed relationships I am clearly the single broken factor.

Last weekend I drove down to Galveston to attend a convention called, oni-con (an anime convention). At first it seemed like a good idea, but I went alone. WORST. IDEA. EVER. I spent the whole weekend alone. When I was at the con all I saw was groups of friends having fun, couples, familes... It really hurt. I spent most of the weekend holed up in my hotel all alone playing computer games on my laptop... needless to say, I will never be doing that again... I did get a cool hat though.