Death

Lately the thought of suicide has been crossing my mind a lot. I don't really know why. It's different this time. I don't feel extremely depressed or anything. I'm not happy by any means, but I've just been thinking about death, and how apart of me can't wait for it. I've been so scared about my future lately that the thought of killing myself just so I don't have to be scared anymore has been crossing my mind at least twice a day, if not more. I'm not hurting myself either, like I said, I'm not depressed.There is just this part of me that doesn't want to be around anymore. I almost find comfort in the thoughts, it's weird. Usually I want to cry when I think about suicide, but lately thinking about it brings this sense of calmness to me.